How to tell your guests simply that children are not invited.

To invite children or not to invite children that is the question…

The decision to invite children or not to invite children to a wedding is a hotly debated topic. Keep in mind that there is no right or wrong answer. In the end, this is a personal choice to be made by the bride and groom. However, you may still be wondering how do you let your invited guests know that their children are not invited to your wedding?

The subtle way…

Addressing your wedding invitations to adults only is the simplest way of letting your guests know that their children are not invited. To eliminate confusion, include the specific names or the number of those invited on the RSVP card.

The problem with the subtle way is just that – it’s subtle. The risk is that some guests may assume they and their kids are a package deal. This can lead to further wedding drama if parents only find out at the last minute and are unable to make arrangements. They may even bring their children to the wedding without even giving you a forewarning. It may be necessary to confirm verbally with these guests that you are not expecting any children at your event.

Straight to the point…

It’s simple, direct and there will be no confusion. Somewhere on your invitation or RSVP card indicate that children are not invited to the wedding. You can use any of the following ‘straight to the point’ statements:

• No children
• Adults only
• Strictly no children please
• Adult wedding and reception
• Please respect our wishes for a child free reception
• Adult only affair
• This invitation is extended to adults only

Although this is quite effective in getting your point across, be aware that some overly sensitive guests may find it rude.

Sugar coat it…

So you’ve got a lot of guests who are ‘pro-kids at weddings’ or you also love kids. For whatever reason, be it budget, space, or venue you and your fiancee have made the decision not to invite children. In this case it may be best if you approach the situation delicately with something cute and thoughtful:

• In order to allow all guests, including parents, an evening of relaxation we have chosen for our wedding day to be an adult only occasion. We hope this advance notice means you are still able to share our big day and will enjoy having the evening off!
• Children at the ceremony, we’d love them on the scene. Reception time, however, is an adult’s only theme.
• To give all our guests the opportunity to let their hair down and have a good time without having to worry about little eyes and ears we politely request no children.
• While we love to watch the children run and play, this is an adults only kind of day.
• Sweet dreams to children under sixteen.

The big drawback of this is that this will take up a lot of room on your invitation or it may come at an extra cost to print out on an extra card.

It’s someone else’s decision…

It is not uncommon for wedding venues to specify no children. Sometimes you just know that a venue isn’t child friendly. Include one of the following statements on your invitation if this is the case:

• Due to restrictions at our venue, children are not invited.
• Management request no children under 16 (or whatever age this may be).
• By request of management no children.
• Regrettably children are unable to attend.

This method is also great. It lays blame on someone else, protecting you from the fire of any disgruntled guests!

Children at the ceremony not at the reception…

If you’re happy to have children attend your wedding ceremony, but not the reception then try something like this:

• Children welcome at ceremony only.
• Wedding ceremony followed by adult only reception.
• Children are very welcome to attend the ceremony but the reception is an adults-only affair.
• Children are welcome at the ceremony. However to allow all of our guests to enjoy an evening of relaxation, we respectfully advise that the reception is for adults only.

What are your thoughts on children at your wedding and how are you planning to handle it. Please let us know! If you just can’t say no, we recommend All American Sitters.