Is Your Wedding Guest List Keeping You Up At Night?

Every time I have a consultation with an engaged couple I ask them the question, “What is keeping you up at night?” And you know what I mean by this. The fever dreams you get in the middle of the night that wake you up and suddenly you spaz out and don’t know what you’re going to do. Those kind of things. I kid you not, dollars to donuts, nine times out of ten, all couples say the wedding guest list is what bothers them the most during wedding planning. It’s either too big, too small, or they have no idea where to start. Who should they invite? Who should they cut? How do they make these tough decisions without upsetting anyone? It’s no wonder the guest list can quickly become one of the most stressful parts of the process. So, to save you from unnecessary headaches, I’ve put together a few helpful hints to make this daunting task a bit easier.

Room To Move and Groove

Whatever number your venue gives you as the maximum guest capacity for the room you’re renting, subtract 50 from it. Why? Well, think about it—more space means more room to move, groove, and have a good time! Nobody wants to be cramped, accidentally elbowing their neighbor during dinner or feeling squished on the dance floor. A little breathing room can go a long way in making your celebration feel more comfortable and enjoyable for everyone.

Kids or No Kids?

Check with your venue to see if they allow children. If they don’t, that could significantly cut your wedding guest list without you having to make some hard decisions. If you’re on the fence about inviting kids, consider how it might affect the vibe of your wedding. Some couples love having children at their celebration—it can add a layer of joy and family togetherness. Others feel it’s better to have an adults-only affair for a more relaxed and grown-up atmosphere. Either way, knowing your venue’s policy on kids will help you narrow things down.

Who Really Matters To You?

Here’s the big one: be honest with yourself about who really matters to you. Be mindful about the people you care about and, more importantly, the people who care about you. Just because someone is family or has known you a long time doesn’t mean they automatically deserve an invitation. If someone makes you miserable—whether it’s a distant relative who loves to stir up drama or a so-called friend who doesn’t bring positivity into your life—don’t invite them. I know it’s a hard truth, but your wedding day is about celebrating your love and joy, not dealing with toxic relationships. Trust me, you’ll feel so much better knowing the people in the room are truly rooting for you.

The Costly Guest List

Lastly, remember that every single person you invite to your wedding comes with a price tag. Each guest costs you money—whether it’s for their meal, linens, chairs, table space, floral arrangements, or even the extra drinks at the bar. That’s not to say you should only think about the financial side, but it’s worth keeping in mind as you make your list. Each guest adds to the overall cost, so be intentional about who you’re choosing to share this special day with.

So there you have it. Cut out the people who don’t bring you joy, be practical about the numbers, and maybe even consider skipping kids for a smaller list. The end result? A wedding that feels more intimate, meaningful, and fun to plan. Good luck, and remember to enjoy the process—it’s your day, after all!